winkgirl4's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Forgive me if I cry through this.... You know what's great? My kids. I had a date with them last night and I still find myself looking across the table at them feeling so in love. I've not had my children for almost three weeks, now, and Raymond (of course, under the guise of wanting to coax some of my affection) agreed to bring them down so that I could have dinner with them. With the state of the office and my having to be in and out of town so much in the past few weeks, it's just been easier for them to have some stability with Raymond- as much as it is. Sorry, that's wrong. Raymond may be many things that keep me at arms length but above all, he loves and protects his children. My unwillingness to say or believe otherwise is exactly the reason why my daughter doesn't stay with me full time. Anyway. He brought them down so that I could steal a few breif moments to have a meal with them. They chose Denny's (which I abhor) but they love because they have toys at the table and they make happy face-shaped pancakes with whipped cream and cherries. So that's where we went. In place of the toys they gave us board games. (You think I'm joking but you'd be wrong. ) So, while we waited the obligatory 40-45 minutes it takes to get us two sets of smiley-face pancakes and a bowl of apple sauce, we played a game of Candyland. And I soaked it in. I laughed at how I got all the bad cards that set me backwards or made me lose a turn, while they were getting all the double colors and free passes. In the end, it was good to see that they were neck and neck when Jordan beat Justin by one color. They asked me about the cruise I'm going on at the end of this week. Jordan wanted to know if I thought that there was a chance that I could get eaten by a shark and I assured her that I didn't have any intention of being anywhere near a shark but if I did I'd bring her pictures. Funnily, that sufficed. Justin wanted to know what I'd do on the boat all that time and I told him the truth, "I was going to spend a lot of time thinking about things and writing." He told me that he hoped that I had a great time as long as I brought him back a sombraro and spoke spanish to at least one mexican person. Jordan's demands were a little larger. She was lost on the idea of owning a hat that she might lay on the floor and dance around in a festive manner but said that I could just bring her three toys including a mexican Barbie. Then when it was time to go and they were getting ready to pull out of the drive we found ourselves saying our "I love you's". I was ready for my little girl to tell me that she loved me one hundred and forty five when she started mumbling, "what's that one number? ...What's that one number?.... OH YEAH," she said, "Mommy, I love you infinity." Now, that IS a lot of love. And I loved her all that and more. 4:35 p.m. - July 28, 2004 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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