winkgirl4's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- confidence "You gain strength, experience and confidence by every experience where you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing you cannot do." --Eleanor RooseveltSo, last night, I slept in my bed. I know. I know. It doesn't seem like that much of an accomplishment but, believe me it was. It was a very big step for me. It's been hard for me to even go into that big room, let alone sleep in there, in a bed that offers no hope of being filled. But, I've started tackling the small obstacles. Taking control of my life. Learning to live it alone. I don't really care for the feeling but if I'm ever going to add someone else to equation, I am beginning to understand why it would be better that I know how to carry myself, first. If I can carry myself then I don't have to worry about whether I'm letting people down or failing people. And it all starts with sleeping in my big, lonely bed, in that big, lonely room that is- in fact- so big that it makes me a bit claustrophobic. (If that makes any sense.) I have to have hope that this isn't the end. I have to believe that there is something to hope for. 1:08 p.m. - 2003-08-27 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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