winkgirl4's Diaryland
Diary
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Braving the Great Outdoors
Braving the Great OutdoorsSo we are going camping. Wanna know why? Well, because there are huge weather systems circling us and we thought that camping with a definite chance of thunderstorms and a slight chance of flash flooding and tornadoes would seem adventurous. Actually, I have no really good explanations. Someone said camping and next thing we knew the tents were being scotch guarded and baskets were being packed and no amount of reasoning with weather would deter us. That�s just the way our family is. Again, I have no explanations. Truth is, I am one of those people who always say, �Oh, yeah, that stuff never happens to us.� We are always the expectant by-sitters (-basically because we are just too lazy to stand). Oh, sure we get out occasional tornado and we definitely get a nice afternoon thunderstorm but we are always just south of the real action. Random factoid: I�ve been within two miles of four tornadoes in my lifetime and haven�t seen a single one of them. Why? No, not because I�m easily distracted. It�s because when the sirens go off, I�m doing what I�m told: hiding in my closet where the tornado can�t find me. See, what you get in me is someone not so interested in standing in my window and watching a tornado hit me. I�m funny like that. But don�t get me wrong, I�m not running hysterical the first second the radar mappy-thingie starts flashing yellow and red designs over my area, but when the sirens go off, you can find me ducking for cover. Another interesting note is that I still tend to wait till the last minute. But only because- as much as I have very little interested in watching a tornado come at me- I don�t like having to admit that I was hiding in the closet, when it didn�t come near us, like I�m always inclined to believe it�s going to. My sister, The Mother Hen- she�s different. She likes running after them. To which I either ask or think, �What the hell are you thinking? What are you going to do with it when you find it? Stand (sit) there and say, �Ooooooooo- pwitty tornado. Oooooooo- it just keeps going round and round.�� Me, not so much. Sorry, this is a funny story I just have to tell someone. Lucky you. Okay, so last night I go to see The Matrix: Reloaded and as we are waiting for the movie to begin, this really loud woman behind me taps me on the shoulder and says, �Is your name Heather BlahBlah?� (I should break in to say that I always hate that question. Always.) Quizzical look. �Yeah.� �I�m [Forgettable Name,]� she says in that way where you know that they expect you to recognize them the moment they tell you their name. �I used to work with your mother.� I just stare at her not really knowing what to say. �Hm. Really? Where did you work with my mother? I seldom remember my mother ever working.� �Yeah, we worked at Nowhere Spectacular together. You look just like her.� Long pause as this news does not sit well with me. �So, how long has your mother been completely crazy?� Heh. (Now this is getting interesting.) �All my life.� �Well, she does keep a clean house. I�ll give her that.� Huh? What?! �MY mother kept a clean house? Now I know you don�t know my mother. My mother never kept a clean house a day in her life.� �Hm. Well, isn�t So-n-So your mother?� ( Insert uncontrollable laughter here) �No. So-n-So is my sister, The Paranoid Alcoholic, who�s only two years older than me.� (More laughter) �Oh, and by the way she�s only been crazy for a few years now.� I just sat back and smiled. Someone thought that the Paranoid Alcoholic was my mother. Heh. I just can�t wait to tell her. As I am typing this, we just got a news bulletin telling us that there�s a tornado on the ground in Enid. For those of you keeping score at home, that would be just north of us. See, it never happens to us. Great (wet) outdoors, here I come.
3:55 p.m. - 2003-05-16
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