winkgirl4's Diaryland Diary

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Happy Mother's Day!!!

Okay, so I intend to spend this weekend doing things- lots of things, tons of things. I will go on movie binges or road trips or I�ll even come to the office and finish up some of the work I�ve let fall behind just to keep from wallowing in self-pity. I�m going to distract myself.

I don�t want this to be one of those really pathetic journal entries. �One of those �Oh, woe is me� type things. I can�t stand those. I really hate it when I�m weepy and whiny. I don�t like being pissy and moany. But it seems that that�s what I am right now.

Truth is, this would be a great weekend to just drink myself silly- this Mother�s Day weekend where I will be without my children. I could just drink and forget all the things that this day makes me feel. I won�t try to go into detail because I�m just not sure I have the words to define what I�m feeling. I will simply say, I feel so far away from everything. I�ve begun creating the distance between my family and me in preparation for the move and I don�t feel any closer to Christian. In fact, lately, I�ve felt farther away.

Anyway.

I sent out a Mother�s Day card to Christian�s mother, my sister, my grandmother, and my foster mother. I did NOT send out a card to my own Mother and I�m not sure how I feel about that.

Anyway.

Happy Mother�s Day.

5:17 p.m. - 2003-05-09

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